Dating After Divorce: The #1 Thing You Need to Do Before You Even Think About Downloading a Dating App

So you’re divorced.

Or almost divorced.

Or maybe technically still married but spiritually LONG GONE.

I see you.

And if you’re thinking about dating again, here’s the real talk no one gave me:

You need to stop and ask yourself one thing before you even think about downloading an app or asking your bestie to hook you up with her hot cousin.

“Am I actually ready?”

Not bored. Not lonely. Not horny. Not trying to prove you’ve still got it. Not looking for a distraction.

READY.

Because even if you left the marriage. Even if you’ve been emotionally checked out for years. You still have healing to do. Reflection to do. You have to get radically honest about how and why your marriage failed, and what you’re bringing into your next relationship if you don’t do the work.

You are in a better position this time around. Why? Because you KNOW some shit now:

• You know why your marriage ended.

• You know how you contributed to it (because it takes two).

• You know what you need. What you don’t need. What you absolutely will NOT tolerate again.

• You know what you have to give. For real this time.

But before you can offer that to someone else, you have to know who the hell YOU are. Deeply. Not “I like sushi and The Bachelor” kind of knowing. I mean core identity knowing.

What you value. What you believe. What lights you up and what shuts you down.

And once you know that?

You hold the damn line.

Make a list of what you’re NOT willing to compromise on. Not because you’re stubborn but because you’re done betraying yourself to be chosen.

Here’s a few things that belong on that list (if they matter to you):

• Religion

• Politics

• Wanting more kids

• Parenting values

• Financial compatibility

• The fact that you will never live more than 10 minutes from a Target again

• And yeah, maybe even your favorite sports team (I’m only half joking)

And when someone comes along with great arms and a golden retriever energy but doesn’t align with your non-negotiables? You walk away. Kindly, confidently, and completely.

Because if you want to do it differently this time... if you want something real... you have to fix what was broken last time. In your relationship. And in yourself.

This time, we’re not playing games.

This is dating after divorce — done right.

👉 Want help holding that standard? Check out the First Date Energy Check-In here!

Grab the FREE first date energy check-in!

With love,

Lindsay